AlltheJokes.com
The best humor! Car and train jokes and funny stories.

WIFE: "There's trouble with the car. It has water in the carburettor."
HUSBAND: "Water in the carburettor? That's ridiculous."
WIFE: "I tell you the car has water in the carburettor."
HUSBAND: "You don't even know what a carburettor is. I'll check it out.
Where's the car?"
WIFE: "In the pool."

A fellow was following a truck in heavy traffic. Every block or so, when
they were stopped at a stop light, the driver of the truck would jump out
of the cab with a big stick and bang on the side of the cargo bay. He'd
then jump back into the cab in time to drive away when the signal changed.
The first fellow observed this for several miles, until he could stand it
no longer. The next time the truck driver jumped out with the stick, the
first fellow jumped out and ran up to him. "I'm sorry to bother you," he
said, over the din of the banging, "but I am very curious; could you tell
me what you are doing?" Without breaking rhythm, the truck driver replied,
"Sure, Mac. Ya see, this here's a six-ton truck but I've got eight tons of
canaries aboard, so I've gotta keep two ton of them flying all the time so
I don't break an axle".

Two cab drivers met.
"Hey," asked one, "what's the idea of painting one side of your cab red
and the other side blue?"
"Well," the other responded, "when I get into an accident, you should see
how all the witnesses contradict each other."

What do you say to a one legged hitch-hiker?

Hop in.

One day a guy was driving with his 4-year-old daughter
and beeped his car horn by mistake.
She turned and looked at him for an explanation.
He said, "I did that by accident."
She replied, "I know that, daddy."
He replied, "How'd you know?"
The girl said, "Because you didn't say 'ASSHOLE!' afterwards!"